


Guilt Tripping

by Chieana



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Angst, Bad Decisions, Break Up, Funny, M/M, Misunderstandings, Persistent Frank Iero, Pining, Stage Gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:42:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26481352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chieana/pseuds/Chieana
Summary: Frank has a dilemma. He’s in love with Gerard.-Frank is so fucking in love with Gerard. Once he starts confessing, he doesn't know how to stop. Gerard is completely oblivious however.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way, Frank Iero/Jamia Nestor (referenced)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 36





	Guilt Tripping

**Author's Note:**

> This is so fucking dumb. I apologize. It made me giggle though 🖤 I'm still not sure how it ended up at 2k.

-

Frank has a dilemma. He’s in love with Gerard. This would be fine, because Gerard isn’t interested in him. Despite his general demeaner suggesting otherwise, Gerard was definitely into women. So Frank knows he doesn’t stand a chance and therefore stays with Jamia, whom he also loves dearly and who he could imagine starting a family with. Which kind of is his life-long dream, to have kids and be a parent.

However.

Gerard gets real close to him on stage. And with all the homophobes pissing Gerard off, he has a tendency to act overly effeminate. And he likes to rub against Frank. Performance boner or not. This is not very healthy for Frank. Who yearns. Oh, and recently, Gerard has started kissing him on stage too. 

The first time it happened, Gerard apologized profusely afterwards. Frank shrugged it off. The second time it happened, Gerard ignored him for the night and had a serious conversation with him in the morning when he was mostly sober. Frank made sure to tell him: “’S okay”. He might have sounded out of breath while saying it, but you’ll never find any evidence.

Ever since then, it’s a somewhat regular occurrence when they get a rough crowd. Frank has had to masturbate a pubescent amount of times throughout touring. It’s becoming a problem. Frank has to confess, so that Gerard may finally stop his attacks. Or so they can get together and start fucking each other, that would work too.

-

One day, Gerard is moping in the van, his greasy black hair dripping down over his face. Frank crawls next to him and nudges him with his head. Gerard smiles vacantly at him before looking down and sighing sadly.

“You okay?” Frank asks. Gerard’s eyes get all teary and he sniffles. Oh boy.

“No one loves me. It’s impossible to love someone like me,” he admits shakily, a single tear dripping down his cheek. Frank feels his heart break, before it starts pumping faster. This is it. He can fix it by confessing. This is the moment. He’s going to risk it all.

“Hey, Gee, that’s not true. I know that’s not true, because, well, because I love you man. I’ve been in love with you for a while. Gerard, I love you, so unbearably much,” Frank admits, blushing fiercely as he stares a hole through the floor. He glances a look at Gerard, but the singer is still sulkily looking down at his fingers. He sniffles again.

“No one loves me,” Gerard whines. Frank feels his heart crack. He quickly makes his escape. That did not go as planned at all.

-

Frank knows Gerard probably dismissed him the previous time he tried, but he wasn’t going to let that stand in his way.

The next time Gerard is going through it, he has slightly longer (definitely greasier) hair and is sulking in their shared hotel room. They’re about to head out and Frank has just finished packing for them both. It’s quicker if he packs Gerard’s stuff too, alright. Frank sits next to him and holds his hand. Gerard gives him a broken smile and squeezes his hand.

“You doing alright?” Frank asks in concern. Gerard sighs shakily and shakes his head.

“It’s dumb.”

“I doubt it. Let it out, you’ll feel better.” Gerard huffs and smiles at Frank. Frank heart skips a beat at the loving look on Gerard’s face.

“Okay… It’s just, this feeling I keep having. I keep fucking up with relationships, you know?” Frank nods, eyes constricting in understanding and pain. He would be so much better to Gerard. “People only want the fame these days, or they think I’m this exotic type of person, or something. No one loves the true me. At least not like that, you know?”

Frank feels his anger boil. He’s going to make sure Gerard knows exactly how he feels.

“That’s not true. I love you, and I see you just as you are, Gerard,” he states firmly. Gerard hums absentmindedly. Dismissed, again. Frank is not going to let him get away with it this time. He acknowledges that Gerard is in a bad state of mind, so maybe if he reads the words later he will take them seriously.

Frank growls and grabs a piece of paper. He writes a lengthy declaration of love, detailing all the little things he loves about Gerard and how he’d break up with Jamia in a heartbeat, he only has to ask. Once done, he neatly folds the paper to fit an envelope. He stands up and gives Gerard the envelope.

“Hey, Way, read this, alright?” Gerard accepts the envelope with a confused quirk of his brow. Then someone’s banging on their door and they make haste to grab their bags and leave for the lobby.

Gerard does not read the letter. It disappears to the bottom of his bag and then is accidentally destroyed in the washer after tour.

-

Frank tries walking around with a sign stating “I love Gerard Way” for a day. Gerard does not react to it. The fans love it though.

-

Frank goes to get a new tattoo, of Gerard’s name, before they record The Black Parade. He shows Gerard, blushing, because the tattoo forces him to flash Gerard his penis. Gerard simply smiles at him and hugs him, telling him he’s his best friend. Frank can feel his heart fracture into tiny little pieces.

Needless to say, Jamia is not very fond of the tattoo and demands he covers it up. Frank does not, so now Gerard’s name is right above his dick forever. It’s not long before Jamia breaks up with him after that.

-

Frank tries another sign, with neon lights this time. It says (in pink): “I am in love with Gerard Way!”

Everyone laughs at him and he gets catcalled by the crew and gets some firm pats on the back by his band mates. Gerard smiles about it before locking himself away for the rest day.

Maybe Frank should give up. He doesn’t want to though.

-

Projekt Revolution. Everything is chaotic and weird. Not having Mikey there for such a long time breaks Frank’s heart a little. He misses the younger Way, his best friend, but he seems happier every day during their text conversations.

Frank rarely sees Gerard, but they’re closer than ever. But only on stage. Gerard even makes out with him! Does he finally realise..? A couple of days (and a dumb stage fight) later and Gerard sits him down excitedly.

“Frankie! I finally found it!” Frank smiles in the face of Gerard’s excitement and spurs him to tell him already. Gerard looks at him with adoring eyes and opens his mouth.

“I finally found the person who truly loves me, for me!” He finally realised! Now they can be together properly- “Lindsey is amazing. I love her so much, Frankie, you have no idea,” Gerard swoons. Frank stills. What? “We’re going to get married on the last day of tour, we’ve arranged everything already. You’ll be there, right?”

Frank resolutely stands up and takes a couple of steps back. He glares at Gerard, unable to stop the tears from dropping down his cheeks. Gerard looks at him in confusion.

“Fuck you! I’ve been in love with you for years, you piece of shit! I kept telling you! Reassuring you! You’re trampling all over my feelings! JAMIA BROKE UP WITH ME BECAUSE I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU, GERARD!” Frank shouts. Ray and Bob show up with concerned faces. Gerard stares at him with bulging eyes.

“How could you ignore me? All this time, I wrote you a FUCKING LOVE LETTER. I got YOUR NAME tattooed on me! YOU MADE OUT WITH ME ON STAGE!” Gerard flinches and looks away. He seems to feel awkward. Frank can’t believe it. All this time. For nothing. He mentally wipes up the remaining pieces of his heart and coddles them to his chest. In reality, he turns around and walks away. Bob follows after him, while Ray stays behind and asks Gerard how he could be so blind. 

Fucking EVERYONE knew. Everyone. His family. His band mates. His friends. Even the fucking fans knew. What a damn mess. Bob catches up with him when they’re in a quiet area and pulls him into a big warm hug. Frank sobs into Bob’s chest, lets all his feelings pour out of him. Bob’s there as a big warm cuddly teddy bear, doing a surprisingly good job at keeping Frank together. After what feels like forever, Frank’s tears finally dry and he’s left to sniffle quietly against Bob’s firm chest.

“You okay to talk?” Bob asks kindly. Frank releases a shaky sigh and shrugs. Bob pushes him away a little so they can look at each other. “He’s an idiot.” Frank giggles and nods in agreement.

“I told him so many times, Bob. In so many ways. Fuck, this hurts.” Bob hums and rubs his hands over Frank’s shoulders.

“You caught Gerard at the wrong moments, I think.” Frank scoffs and somehow more tears drip out of his eyes. It’s starting to burn.

“I should have told him when he was feeling good, instead of when he was down. I know Gerard hardly acknowledges anything when he’s down. Why didn’t I just tell him when we were talking about comics? Or when we were watching lord of the rings together? Why didn’t I pull him closer every time he kissed me on stage and whisper it in his ear? Fuck, why did I fall in love with him? He doesn’t even like guys!”

“That’s not true, Frankie,” Gerard said fiercely. Frank jumped and turned towards his voice. Gerard is panting a little, seemingly having run over. There is an impressive hand mark on his face. Frank’s face contorts in concern, but Gerard waves him off.

“I had no idea you loved me Frank, because I never let myself believe it. Yeah, you told me, showed me, got a tattoo, but that’s just how you are. Or that’s what I told myself. I’ve been holding back from the start, the only thing I had with you was on stage and I had resigned myself to never having more than that. I thought you were going to marry Jamia!” Frank sniffles at Gerard’s panicky hand gestures.

“Jamia broke up with me months ago, Gerard, I called you immediately.”

“You sounded genuinely heartbroken! I wasn’t gonna take advantage of you!” Ray and Bob cough in the background. “Okay, I didn’t mean to take advantage of you, but we kissed on stage all the time anyway.”

“Of course, I was heartbroken! I was alone! I was begging you to come over, because I wanted to confess, _again_. For one last time, to try and get you to understand, but you just told me to go to sleep.” Gerard starts crying, soft hiccups interrupting the quiet of the air.

“I’ve loved you ever since I saw you panic over potentially being asked to be our rhythm guitarist. You were so fucking high and your eyes widened comically when we talked about it. I remember it so vividly, just feeling it and thinking: ‘Wow, that’s the person I want to be with forever.’ But you were happy with Jamia,” Gerard explains and breaks down. Frank rushes over and hugs him. Bob and Ray are awkwardly hovering around them, both wearing confused and concerned faces.

“I didn’t know. Gerard, I fell in love with you the first time I saw you perform live. I tried to ignore the feelings, because I was with Jamia and I wanted a family. But then we spend all our time together and while we were getting high off paint fumes I realised that I could never live without you in my life,” Frank says. Gerard laughs and grabs Frank’s face in both his hands, pressing a teary kiss to his lips.

“I fucking love you,” Gerard whispers as he pulls back. Frank smiles at him.

“I fucking love you too, asshole,” he responds and kisses Gerard sweetly. Bob and Ray release audible breaths of air.

“I broke up with Lindsey,” Gerard admits when they lean back again. “She slapped me across the face.”

“You deserved that. I should have slapped you too.” Gerard laughs and nods. They lean in again and Frank feels his heart settle. He has a feeling things will be okay from now on.

-

Frank did not take into consideration that Mikey might have opinions on him dating his brother. The first show Mikey’s back he has to avoid the bassist, because he seems hell bent on trying to kick Frank over.

They work it out eventually. But only after Frank proposes to Gerard and Gerard spills his guts to Mikey in excitement. Mikey ends up as Frank’s best man.

Oh, and the fans harass them for two days when they go public before it’s old news and people kind of don’t bring it up much anymore. Beyond the average picture spams and declarations of wanting a ‘love like theirs’ that is.

-

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry about the angst that snuck in there, haha 🖤
> 
> Come shout at me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/ChieanaStrider), I won't bite 😇 unless you say the magic word 😈 (I swear I'm nice, I'm just also hella awkward 💔)


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